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It seems we are all seeking
work-life balance in our lives.
* The busy Career Professional
working hard to get ahead.
* The Stay-at-Home Mom who meets everyone's needs but her own.
* The Entrepreneur who loves her job but often feels engulfed by it.
Sometimes it seems we need to
be all things to all people: parent, child, boss, friend, spouse. There are
a million demands on our time - all seemingly valid and important. Trying to
meet them all leaves us feeling as though we are on a treadmill of activity
with no end in sight. So how do we live a life that has balance, peace,
time, and still meet our responsibilities?
The Key to Work-Life Balance
Is Knowing Who You Are
Yes, it really is that simple.
When you know who you are, you know what is really important to you. When
you know what is important to you, it is easier to make choices that support
you and how you want to live your life. In coaching, what is important to
you is called your values. Values do not refer to ethics or moral standards.
Values are the essence of who you are. They are the behaviors and activities
that bring you great joy or that come easily and naturally to you. When you
are engaged in these activities, you feel most like yourself: connected,
energized, and peaceful. When your actions, thoughts, beliefs, and goals are
aligned with your values, you are living in integrity and will experience a
sense of peace, meaning, and purpose in your life. Knowing your values is
about knowing who you are.
We often get caught up in doing all sorts of things that we think we should
be doing, but that are not very important. We are constantly confronted with
multiple possibilities of how to spend our work and personal time. There is
not enough time to do it all. We often must give up one thing in order to
have time to do another. This is why it is vital that you are very clear on
what is important to you (your values) and are clear on what you absolutely
need to get done for any given week. It is important to recognize the
priorities in all aspects of your life. When you know what is most important
to you and have clear priorities, then it is easier to make choices on how
to use your time. Be honest with yourself about what you can do and what you
want to do. Priorities will change day-to-day, week-to-week, and
year-to-year. Different things will be more important to you at different
times in your life. Be very clear on what is most important to you. Many
people may spend up to 35 hours per week watching television. Is this a real
priority for you? Perhaps you would rather choose a movie or one really good
television show that you enjoy and let the others go. This would free up
huge amounts of time for you to do a myriad of other things. It is good to
re-visit your priorities on a weekly basis. What is a priority this week,
may not be a priority next week. Sometimes it is easy to be clear on your
priorities (attend Johnny's concert) and sometimes it is not so clear.
When you are setting priorities consider:
* Why am I doing this?
* Is this something I need to do or is it something I want to do?
* Or neither? Who else can do this?
* Is it important that I do this right now or can it wait?
* Will doing this support my goals and my values?
Setting priorities will help
you make conscious and informed choices on how you are using your time. It
is all about living with purpose. Spending your time focused on priorities
will increase your peace of mind and bring greater meaning and purpose to
your life because you are focused on what is really important to you in all
aspects of your life.
Coaching Questions
* Are you clear on what is most
important to you? On your values?
* Are you honoring your values with your choices and actions in your life
right now?
* How do you know?
* What would you like to have more of in your life?
* What do you need to let go of to make time for these things?
Take Action
1. Set Weekly Priorities
At the start of each week think about all of the things that you need or
want to do in all areas of your life (home, work, family, self, volunteer).
Make a list and then decide what is most important for you to do this week.
When you are determining your priorities and activities for the week - base
your decisions on which ones will truly honors who you are and will support
your values and goals. If that volunteer work you have been doing the past 2
years no longer speaks to your heart and soul, then it may be time to let
that obligation go.
Next, schedule time in your week for these priorities. Be sure to also
schedule 30-60 minutes in each day for flex time. This time prevents you
from over scheduling and allows time for the unexpected, extra time for
those things that take longer than we think they will, and downtime to use
how you like.
Hold your schedule lightly. It will not serve you to slavishly follow a
rigid schedule of to-do's. By setting priorities on a weekly basis, rather
than a daily basis, you build in some flexibility on when you can get them
done.
2. Set Boundaries
Set boundaries on how you want to spend your time and honor them. You may
choose to make 5-9 pm each evening family time. If you do, be sure you do
not return calls or check your email during this time. Perhaps you have
scheduled in an hour in the evening to go to he gym. That's great! Do not be
waylaid by answering the phone on your way out the door.]
Live Your Values - Love Your
Life!
Creating life-work balance is
really about honoring who you are and what is important to you. It is about
choosing how you spend your time based on your values. Values are important
because they bring meaning and purpose to your goals and actions. Life is
fullest when you access your truth, love, and creativity and live so that
you are true to who you are.
If you would like to learn more about identifying your values, fully
honoring who you are in your everyday living, or creating time and space in
your life for what is important to you. Please visit my website for more
information and my free 4 week self-help course: Free Self-help Course -
Living Authentically at
http://www.futureperfect.ca/living_authentically.html
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